How do you know when you're happy?

Happiness. Isn't it the goal of life? The end game? I disagree, but before I tell you why let's check and see what we're talking about first.

What is happiness? Is it a feeling? Is is a state of being? Is it a choice?

If it is a feeling, then I'm not sure it can also be a choice. Because last time I checked, I couldn't just say "I want to feel happy," and then BLAM, it happened. Methinks there are a few steps between wanting to feel it and feeling it.

Plus, aren't feelings like the weather? They change for all kinds of reasons, many of which are out of our control? In this case, holding on to happiness is futile.

So, let's say happiness is that bubbling, energy feeling you get when you're doing something. Sometimes it makes you smile without reason. Sometimes it makes you want to belt out this song:

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That's what I did today. I was walking along, and then suddenly, Dooba-dooba-doop-doop-doop.......oh. And then I recorded myself singing it and sent it to my friend Jen.

I also saw people setting up for a wedding in the cafeteria at school. The linens and the table settings made me feel happy, so I called Brett to tell him I'm so excited to marry him.

Notice that when I felt happy, I immediately felt compelled to connect with people I love. Happiness is like that. It's a connector emotion.

So if happiness is so great, why don't I think it's the point of life?

Because chasing happiness doesn't lead to happiness. Thinking about happiness can actually drive you mad. And expecting yourself to be happy when you're not is painful. I really do believe that the point of life is to feel the whole spectrum of feelings. Let them guide you, flow through you, and then kiss them on the cheek and let them go. The inner peace that comes with being okay with the fleetingness of emotions is where the real meat and potatoes of life is.

But since I'm still feeling it now, I'm gonna go belt out some Mariah.